Source Souring: When Good Folks Go Bad

For all of my readers, I’m sorry it has taken me this long to write another post. Between tours and side work, I haven’t had an abundance of time to think lately. Luckily, things have died down a bit so it’s time to dive back in full force. Thanks for sticking around!

Who likes to learn out there? I know I do, and we should all like to learn. After all, being a lifelong student of your craft is one of the best paths to be on in this industry. One of the ways I learn, is through talking to and studying other people/players. I love to bounce ideas off of trusted sources that will give me real feedback and what I need to hear (and not necessarily what I want to hear, which helps with growth). But what happens when a source turns sour? A person that you were once enamored with becomes hard to handle because any deviation from their advice (which may not be the gospel truth) causes them to call you out as wrong and foolish. This sort of situation has caused me to lose sleep and I’ve allowed myself to get extremely angry and stressed out over it. So, how do you remedy this sort of situation?

There are people out there who are unable to see beyond their own wisdom. While their wisdom can be completely legit, if you start skirting the outer edges of it or you choose to do something different, they can get feisty. Continuing to go to individuals like this is similar to a dog forgetting about the buried electric wire at the edge of the yard. He gets excited and tries to run to the street but then gets shocked. These sources can continually set you back and prevent you from really attaining your full potential. However, do NOT confuse this “source souring” with being told something that you don’t want to hear. It has to do with your source failing to recognize that there can be more than one way of doing things.

When you find a source like this (or one that was previously good but then turns sour), it’s usually best to quietly back away and stop bringing things to them. This can be difficult if you both are friends, but it’s necessary to preserve the friendship and your own sanity. Bringing the issue up to them can be volatile and can end in disaster. Please keep in mind that this topic is incredibly subjective and every situation is different. The key is to evaluate your source and yourself and make the best decision you are able.


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